Miranda and Alexander’s Story
After five years, three miscarriages and one ectopic pregnancy, Miranda wrote a memoir about dealing with the waiting, the doubting, the despairing and the hoping of almost-motherhood. Adrift is an honest, funny and brave book that will provide a valuable connection for so many.
While writing the book, Miranda continued her own journey, and shortly before it was published, she welcomed her son into the world. She shares her experience and hopes for the book:
“I met Alexander in a pub in Oxford when I was 20 years old and taking part in a study abroad programme. We settled down and, as we both wanted children, when I was 26 and Alexander was 31, I came off the pill and started to try for a baby.
“After a year with no success, just as our GP referred us to see our local NHS fertility clinic, we discovered I was pregnant. About seven weeks later I miscarried. Six months later, we asked for our referral to the fertility clinic to be picked back up.
We had a really positive experience at every stage of the process. We felt very supported by the staff, and were able to speak with people or ask questions anytime on our online portal account. Everyone was very sensitive to our history and was so reassuring.
“As part of the referral process, we underwent lots of tests, but they all came back clear. With no definite diagnosis, I was prescribed Clomid to stimulate ovulation. I fell pregnant on my second cycle, but again I miscarried at around seven weeks.
“After a few months I started taking Clomid again and we conceived, but this time I experienced an ectopic pregnancy and needed surgery to remove my left fallopian tube.
“We had now been trying for a baby for three years. Although there was still no definite reason why we were facing problems, due to the amount of time it was taking and because of my surgery, it was recommended we consider IVF. We were advised that we would likely be eligible for a round of NHS-funded IVF, but that we would only be able to apply for the funding once two years had passed since I had last conceived. We decided to wait and see what happened.
“Two years later, I still hadn’t conceived naturally, and we became eligible for one cycle of funded IVF. Once we’d secured our funding, we researched clinics, but there was little question in our mind that we’d choose Oxford Fertility. We’d heard good things about the team from friends and family, and we also live very near, so we knew it would be easy to get to appointments!
“During our first cycle, everything went well. We produced five embryos; one was transferred whilst the other four were frozen. We felt hope when I tested positively, but at 12 weeks I miscarried again.
“With four good embryos frozen, we decided to try again. Although we would have to fund treatment ourselves, a frozen IVF cycle, even a medicated one, is less expensive than a completely new fresh IVF cycle. This time it worked, and despite our nervousness, my pregnancy continued and we welcomed our son into the world in May.
“He is absolutely perfect and we can’t thank Oxford Fertility enough for all of their support. We had a really positive experience at every stage of the process. We felt very supported by the staff, and were able to speak with people or ask questions anytime on our online portal account. Everyone was very sensitive to our history and was so reassuring.
“I wrote Adrift when I didn’t know what our outcome would be, whether I would one day become a mother, or if I would take another path. I wanted to share my experiences, to spotlight the uncertain landscape that many find themselves in after they decide to have a baby, and provide comfort to those currently there.
“Oxford Fertility made a huge difference to our journey and I hope my book will help support others on theirs.”